What is ‘home’? by Amy Peck: Runner up of the LGSM Creative Writing Competition

Encased outside of plaster 

Backlit against something unknown Perhaps if I open up the blinds 

Slip my fingers between them 

Look out 

Study it 

Then I can run my mind over it 

The streetlamps will take the place of trees The buildings will morph back  

Bumps will smooth over 

New streets will stretch out 

Keyboards clatter like birdsong 

The fan hums 

Soft and never ending 

I crave the silence 

I wonder if I will ever taste it again 

No voices make themselves known But they call for me 

Miles and miles and miles and miles and miles Between us 

Outside 

The leaves fall 

Outside the glass

The only birds I have are gulls 

The eggs in my fridge are store bought 

The kitchen does not smell of dog 

But it feels less cold 

Despite the ice forming 

The blinds are open now 

It’s easier to watch the world go by 

When there are drinks in hands  

Smiles across faces 

Laughter in our kitchen 

When the sun comes out 

I plan running routes without moving 

And a match lights to straw 

Until I have a mane of fire 

I wonder how I am perceived 

If I’m going to stay here 

If perhaps I made a mistake 

Then I watch someone walk by 

And they look up 

Eyes locked for a second too short 

They walk away 

And suddenly it seems like I have an eternity to decide 

I receive a call from my mother 

The word slips out 

World split in two

There and here 

Have I got an answer to my question?